Sculpting Project: Change Your Frequency and Drop the Guilt Or Timing for the Above Average

I’m on a walk with a friend and she tells me how she has incorporated the sculpting projects into her regular routines. I am pleased, but also in awe. How does she keep doing this day in and day out?

I don’t know if it’s because I love variety or because I lack grit, but I have a hard time continuing a sculpting project for weeks on end. There is a reason I created two week projects. I know it works for me. After two weeks my energy and pleasure in a project often declines. I admire people who can continue a project for months on end and seem to still find it life giving. For me the project too quickly loses it’s freshness.

I can feel guilty about this lack of endless follow through. After all, I have convinced my self that these projects are very valuable – verified by research. I know I am not alone in this guilt. I remember a note from one member of my first sculpting group that said, “ What I have learned in our Sculpting Group is that I am a very undisciplined person.” This was just not true; this woman was very disciplined in many areas of her life. The projects I created had helped create inappropriate guilt for her. And maybe for myself as well.

For whatever reason I have told myself that when I discover a helpful practice I should do it day in and day out – forever. What day should I not be grateful, eat with pleasure, smile, flash prayers, stop time, say the Jesus prayer, move with energy, be kind, . . . ?

All these projects are life-giving for ourselves and those who encounter us.

But for many of us there is more to the timing of doing sculpting projects than the simple “Do it every day.”

Most of us have a need for variety. For many of us — I am one– the desire for variety is very strong.

Some interesting research that expanded my world.

Study 1: Gratitude Lists

For 6 weeks people make gratitude lists

Group 1 makes a list once a week

Group 2 makes a list 3 times a week

Guess which group had an increased happiness and gratitude at the end of 6 weeks?

Surprise. It was not the group that did it more often It was the once a week group.

Study 2: Acts of Kindness

For 6 weeks people do 5 acts of kindness (special, above and beyond our usual kind acts).

Group 1 does all the acts in a single day each week

Group 2 does one act a day for 5 days.

Which group experienced significant elevation in happiness?

It was group 1 again. All in one day is more effective that spreading them out.

Lesson: Timing matters.

Some sculpting projects will work best on a weekly basis rather than daily.

One more study:

People are instructed to do acts of kindness over 10 weeks

Group 1 was to do the same act over and over.

Group 2 was to do something different each time.

As you might have guessed the variety group came out with increased happiness, but interestingly the repeated act group had decreased happiness levels after the 10 weeks.

Lesson: We need variety.

Final lesson:

Average Person Research tells us statistics of what happens for the average person.

Who is the average person? Nobody, really.

We are each responsible to discover what works well for us.

Which projects work the best for you?

How often should you do them to gain maximum benefit?

Discovering the most helpful way to use these projects is your job.

You and I are not ‘average’. We are, of course, all above average.

Sculpting project: Timing for the Above Average

Experiment with timing / frequency for one or more project.

• Try it daily, or weekly
• Vary the projects.

One day ask ‘What went well?’ Another day eat a meal taking as much pleasure as possible or flash prayers.

I am finding the concept of playing with frequency and variety to be liberating. On my next walk I will chat with my friend about my liberation and make sure she is sculpting guilt free.